Posted: April 15, 2010 in Uncategorized


Creating a Culture of Powerful WomEn, The Good and The Stalkers


I made comment on my internet facebook that a few woman who don’t know me well felt very insecure about. It was about stalkers, and how I have been attacked by their false attention. I am not an arrogant man I do not believe people are stalking me all the time. There have been very specific instances that are very hard to deal with at times. I wanted to write this to bring freedom to everyone else that I do not think the average woman who wants to talk is unhealthy. I think the opposite, I am trying to think the best.


Let me qualify that to be a stalker it means you have the following:


1) You live in fantasy of relationship that doesn’t exist. This may be for marriage, or a pretend friendship that you feel is very close when in fact you don’t have that level of relationship, etc.

2) You pursue the person with aggression, with false intention, and with a consistency that violates normal relational boundaries. You don’t honor new boundaries set before you even when talked to specifically and directly.

3) You have a selfish agenda and try to spiritualize it or make the person suite your agenda. You make threats against the persons life, you prophecy their doom or unhealthy if they don’t do what you want them to do

4) You are unwilling to hear anything but what you want to hear about that person


I have had aggressive communications bombard me from these women, people have broken into my hotel rooms, houses, I have had women who have constantly shown up at restaurants I am at at the same time consistently to try and be a part, woman have followed me into mens rest rooms, I have had woman hold on to me and have to be pulled off by police, I have had woman leave messages on our voicemails and emails up to 20 times a day (day after day after day), they have dressed up in disguises when I have had restraining orders on them to get close to me, they have tried to kiss me aggressively, they have made extremely sexual comments and communications, and finally I have had threats and death attacks from woman who are just crazy.


This is a very specific type of personality disorder. People have asked me why this happens to me. Well I am single and a public figure in a religion that champions marriage and family. I am not ugly and I am 35 which puts me in an age bracket that apparently is attractive in the church. But most of all I am called in my ministry and our movement to help champion woman and see them become powerful. This is attractive to both healthy amazing woman but also is a target for an attack of imbalanced woman at times.




Guess what, I love advocating woman and helping to see woman be who they are supposed to be. Of course I am a mans man and have incredibly powerful men around me but I also have a gift and mandate from the Lord to raise up woman in leadership and believe in them.


Having these stalking woman after me at times has not caused me to back down or to be mad. It is discouraging at time. It is very scary at times. It is always funny because if you don’t have joy you have lost the battle.


One of the special woman in my life was Jill Austin. She was an amazing woman, a powerful woman, and a prophetess. She told me the reason why I have so many wrongly aggressive woman stalking me was because of my calling to help advocate a new breed of woman who would be leaders and builders in society and in the church where woman haven’t been before. She said “Some people are color blind and you are going to be both color blind and gender blind when helping to build the Kingdom.” I take great Jesus pride in the fact that we have so many powerful races and woman in our ministry. I love that some of my close friends aren’t just white men in my social sphere, but I have woman and men of all races and types around me. It is very outside of the box but won’t be one day.


What I don’t want is normal woman being insecure that I think all woman might stalk me. The reality is you can tell a woman with wrong intentions right away but that doesn’t mean she is a stalker. You are a stalker and imbalanced when you have sacrificed your identity to be part of mine.


I also want to say publically that I have not met my wife and that if anyone thinks they God has spoken to you about marrying me you are deceived. I will meet my wife through normal relationship and God will give us both knowledge as we choose each other. I just think this is a healthy boundary to keep. I have about 20 women a year tell me God has told them that I am their husband, and some of these women are amazing people and I try and release them gently in love. Some of the women are incredibly creepy even though they are not stalkers but they are still women who have no identity. I don’t have the power to change them so I just try and point them to where they can get help.


I have never been mean or thought of myself as self important. I just have a mandate to champion the female gender (as well as the male gender) and I am willing to take the brunt of weirdness that brings at times especially being single. I also live in Hollyweird, I mean Hollywood LOL.


Love you and pray you see God’s hear t with me in this.


Prayer for those who feel called to marry me:


I pray that God breaks any deception off of you and any false voice that came to you or any dream or vision or imagination you thought was God. I pray that God releases you to your real destiny of marriage and takes any identity out of being with me. I pray that you can have balanced relationships with men so you can be a powerful woman.

  1. jonny says:

    dude this is so solid! people in our church have been hearing WEIRDD words about who their spouse is and we’ve been having to address it as a body. so encouraging reading something like this.


  2. andria says:

    i met my husband when i least expected or wanted it…i think that is part of the blessing..the surprise…the opening of the gift GOD puts before you…how the relationship unfolds….Thank you Jesus! He was the last person i thought id marry and he has been the Biggest blessing in my life. Heading towards 8 years of marriage!Once again Thank you Jesus for this surprise gift…and the blessing of my 3 children that came from it!

  3. Well welcome to Gee sorry you had to put up with women who have done such things to you, but God covers you and He is awesome when it comes to knowing that you have the makeup to be able to handle such a cross in this area.

    Bless you Shawn and may the Lord increase the anointing and mantle on your life.


  4. Roxanne Townsend says:

    Wow Bravo! That was creative and funny yet very informative. We have just started to really understand and discuss boundaries at our church and this is a great example. I too know that I have been called to help women find their identity and to learn to value themselves for exactly who God made them to be. If you know if any reading or teachings for that I would appreciate the suggestions!

  5. Thanks Shawn! That’s great 🙂

  6. Andrea says:

    painfully beautiful. refreshing to hear the flip side. keep saying yes to Jesus. you’re right—it’ll be worth it.

  7. kristy shirley says:

    wow that’s aweful! I had no idea it could be like that. I wonder if women in ministry go through the same kind of thing. Thanks for being so transparent. Blessings and Love to you!!

  8. Sally Hanan says:

    Loved this. You should write a book about it. 😀

  9. Kelly says:

    appreciate you shawn!!! thanks for serving the women in our generation so well!!!!

  10. Lumi says:

    wow. no beating around the bush. needs to be done.

  11. WOW! I love the image on your post, very interesting =)

    Anyway, this post is awesome! WOMEN are really STRONG and AMAZING!

    Job well done!

  12. AJ says:

    Wow, this is really good – said with honesty and yet full of love and grace.
    I had a friend as a teenager who was so sure God spoke to her about who she was supposed to marry (he is in the public eye as well) and I’ve watched it destroy her over the years. This seems to be a common tool of the enemy to keep women from being power women. Some things are just very unfruitful to focus on and if we find ourselves focusing on marriage and who we are supposed to marry more than we are focused on God we are in deep trouble.
    The truth is, especially as women, what difference does it really even make? I believe women were meant to be pursued by their future husband, not the other way around, so if a woman isn’t being pursued by a specific guy, why even think about it? This doesn’t mean a woman shouldn’t have a healthy INTEREST in someone and by all means we SHOULD be praying for our future spouses – but focusing on and praying about who that person IS, is very dangerous to a woman, no matter how stable she is!
    I do wonder though, what will happen when you do find a wife, Shawn? What will all the other women do? 😉 JK 😉

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